Twenty

Anyone who knows me, knows that I enjoy the zombie genre. No, I haven't seen the classic zombie movies, but my tastes lean more towards contemporary zombies. I enjoy Shawn of the Dead, 28 Days Later (which is particularly unnerving), and I have been thoroughly enjoying The Walking Dead on AMC.

I've had many hypothetical conversations with my friends and husband about what we would do in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I'm one of those people. No, we're not preparing ourselves for any such thing, but it's fun to have a circling debate about what areas would be the safest, how would you get supplies, what would you use as weapons with the skills that you have, and things like that. On that note, I would never actually want to see a zombie apocalypse or anything of the sort come to fruition. I like zombies the best out of pirates and ninjas -- two other highly violent groups that are romanticized in pop culture -- because they don't actually exist.

What makes the zombie film genre so interesting is that it's not really all about the zombies. It's not about the gore, no matter how much there is or how impressive the effects are, but the bottom storyline is all about human nature. The Walking Dead especially illustrates the dynamics of human nature in the face of dire survival. When the characters are forced to protect their loved ones and make alliances with strangers for the sake of surviving, the line between good and bad, right and wrong, eventually start to get blurred. Mistakes are made. Friends become enemies. The moral world as we know it (at least in Western culture) cracks in very fine, and major, ways. Desperation pushes us beyond logical reasoning. Every action is justified.

In some ways, it's a fitting caricature of a post-9/11 America.





Before 9/11, we could fly to and from places without fear of something happening on an airplane. I remember traveling by myself from Pennsylvania to Texas when I was 15 years old, the same year that two older teenagers killed several of their peers at Columbine and just two years before 9/11.

I didn't need to do much to get through security, and not even an eyebrow was raised to a teenager traveling by herself. It was my first time flying anywhere, too, so I pretty vividly remember what I needed to do. My next time being on an airplane was when I was 23. Big difference in protocols, and things have changed even more since then. Underwear bombs gave way to body scanners and nude protests at the airport. On one level I understand the need for security because we seem to be living in an increasingly dangerous world where Americans are not very well liked, thanks to the wonders of the internet and YouTube. On the other hand, I of course find it going too far. But I don't know what the boundary ought to be.

Ever since 9/11, it would seem some of my fellow Americans have felt increasingly threatened. At least, in my observations, which are admittedly limited. Not only by those outside the country are considered suspicious, but certainly within. If you're not quite right, or the same as someone else, you're a threat. If you don't vote for the same party, you're a threat. If you don't believe everything exactly the same way that I do, you're a threat. From what I can tell, 9/11 brought in an uneasy fear into public thought. While I would be inclined to blame mass media and internet conspiracy theories for this, I don't actually know how this happened. But it happened. Something did. Something broke in the American consciousness.

Then war was declared. Some were for it. Others against it. 

Ever since then, tragedies of all kinds of proportions have come to pass. Our trust in the American government is waning, although that has probably been going on ever since the Red Scare of Communism in the 1920s and 1940/50s and whenever UFOs were first reported. There have been so many mass shootings on American soil, the next seemingly more atrocious than the last.

2012 alone has had 6 to 7 major shootings, according to this timeline.. Only a week ago, the most heartbreaking involved the death of 20 children. I made the mistake of reading the profiles of each of the children and adults who were killed, and it was difficult to keep myself from weeping. The thought weighs like a millstone on my heart.

With each and every shooting - regardless of the death toll or the age of victims - comes the great debate regarding gun control. Hackles rise on those for more gun control, and teeth bare on those for less gun control laws. Both sides are fundamentally concerned about protecting their loved ones, and really no one can fault them for that. Personally, I have been keeping out of the debate about gun control, simply because it can get nasty. That's the same reason I generally have avoided discussing politics. No one seems to keep a cool head about it.

I started out this blog entry talking about zombie genre and how it narrates human nature and survival and desperation. In many ways I feel that Americans find themselves in that type of position. In my limited experience of 28 years of life, it is my observation that the society I belong to has become increasingly afraid of what they perceive (whether real or imagined) to be a threat. The issue of gun control is just one of those topics that brings it out most strongly because the issue of survival is a reality. People are forced to protect their loved ones; the line between good and bad, right and wrong, eventually start to get blurred. Mistakes are made. Friends become enemies. The moral world as we know it cracks in very fine, and major, ways. Desperation pushes us beyond logical reasoning. Every action is justified.

To be straight with you, I don't have answers on how violence of this type can be solved, but I won't pretend that I don't have an opinion or that things should stay status quo. Something needs to change. In general, I'm for more gun restrictions and control. While guns have always made me feel uneasy (my dad kept one around the house when we were kids and I think he still has it, not once has he ever had to use it), I think it's more reasonable for an average citizen to own a handgun or something like a shotgun that would be used to hunt with, than it is to own an assault rifle. So, I think it's fair to place more restrictions on assault weapons and who legally has access to them. One may argue that criminals will always find a way to get access to assault weapons, regardless of their legality, so that shouldn't be the reason to have stricter gun laws. Criminals will also find ways to access illegal drug; that doesn't mean we should make drugs legal to the public. The argument is ultimately not helpful to finding a solution. Neither is the argument that because knives kill people (events recently in China being cited frequently), we may as well ban those too if we are banning guns.

My concern with the rigidity of individuals that are for less gun restrictions in wake of tragedies like this is that gun ownership is not primarily about defending and practicing the Second Amendment. The demand the right to bear arms seems to primarily come out of fear or a lack of control. I cannot control the situations around me, so I must take control by being able to defend myself with a gun. It is compensating for an insecurity. I realize not all gun owners are like this. I know that no one will like the sound of that. But if someone is putting their trust and safety in an object, then the only thing remaining if that object is taken away is fear or emptiness and perhaps wrath. I am reminded of an man on the west coast a few years ago who was a prominent businessman in his company, until it started to crumble due to the recession and he lost his job. I can only speculate that his life, safety, and trust were invested in the position he held because shortly afterward he killed his family and himself.  That's an extreme example, but it's hard not to go there when the extreme questions about protecting your family with a gun are thrown out there. I am unwilling to hurt someone with my words, even when they hurt me very deeply, let alone with an actual weapon of destruction.

Perhaps what is more upsetting about this gun control debate is that it would seem that a large number of Americans who consider themselves Christians are among the loudest voices of defending their right to bear arms. This is puzzling, when even Jesus admonishes one of his followers (presumably Peter, I think) for taking up the sword against the guards and priests when they came to take Jesus captive, to later be crucified (Matthew 26:50-53). Our Lord even goes so far as to say, "You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well^. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you." (Matthew 5:38-42). This is radical teaching, and a passage troubling on its own without the extremes of mass shootings, and raises several "but what if" types of questions. I honestly am still trying to figure out how this passage applies to every day life in a city where there are more violent crimes in one year than there are days. Whatever the case, it would seem that many who would say they are Christians are full of fear; they walk in fear, not in love. They become angry when certain "rights" seem to be infringed, when the truth of the matter is that we don't have the right to claim anything for ourselves. Christ bought us with his life; what we have is purely by the grace of God. Shouldn't we be confident that he will take care of us, regardless of what we do and do not have? Or is the fear so strong and the desire for control so powerful, that we do not see how desperately he cares for us and meets our true needs?

Not to say that believing that is easy. It's hard. Especially in the wake of tragedy. 

But the point is to ask, why are we so afraid? What was it that broke in the American consciousness?

Like I mentioned before, I don't have any answers for what should or shouldn't be done in regards to gun control laws. I know that other countries have significantly less gun violence related problems as a result of gun control, but many of those countries are also vastly different in history and public thought than America. It's hard to take a model from another type government system when there are plenty of other issues going on. I for one think that acknowledging and treating mental illness in more effective and long-lasting ways is needed. I think that kids bullying each other unfettered is a major problem, and that schools should be more active and parents more involved (and less threatening/reactive) in working towards safe environments. I think that Americans feeling they have a right to do and say and act however they want on the internet -- and increasingly in public -- is also a major problem. There is so much that goes into this whole topic that one cookie-cutter solution isn't going to work. It's just going to make some people happy and others irate, and others will think America is going to dissolve into anarchy while others think it will dissolve into tyranny. 

All I can really do is pray (for our country, for families affected by violence, for so many things), vote on or petition the things I think are important, and try to figure out how to love my enemies. And where permitted, have civil conversation with those who disagree with my point of view.

On a final note, I'll leave you with some song lyrics, and just two articles:

"Tell me would you kill to save a life / tell me would you kill to prove you're right / Crash, crash burn / Let it all burn / this hurricane's chasing us all underground." - 30 Seconds to Mars

"I don't hate my enemy, I hate the fear he's brought over my land." - House of Heroes

"All the love in the world is right here among us / and hatred too. / So we must choose what our hands will do. / Where there is pain, let there be grace. / Where there is suffering, bring serenity. / For those afraid, help them be brave. / Where there is misery, bring expectancy. / For surely we can change, / surely we can change, / something."- David Crowder Band


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